A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her husband!”

Q: Does an apple a day really keep the doctor away? A: Yes, but only if you aim it well.

“Doctor, doctor, You’ve got to help me – I just can’t stop my hands shaking!” “Do you drink a lot?” “Not really – I spill most of it!”

Two Men Are Taking .. 1 Man: “I’m Going To Bring My Wife To Australia For Our 20th Anniversary.” 2. Man : “Oh.. That’s Cool. What About Ur 25th Anniversary?” 1 Man : “I Will Go Back To Australia To Bring Her Back.”

A Qualified MBA Marketing Student married a girl After 1 year of tough life with Her, Finally he got angry & Sent a note to his father-in-law: “UR PRODUCT IS NOT ACCORDING 2 MY REQUIREMENTS” The smart father-in-law Replied: 1 year Warranty has been expired! So Manufacturer is not responsible

A man in Hell asked Devil: Can I make a call to my Wife? After making call he asked how much to pay. Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.

Husband & wife – Love your enemy From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said, “One month after I die, I want you to marry Samy.” “Samy! But he is your enemy!” “Yes, I know that. I’ve suffered all these years; so let him suffer now.”

If you were my husband, I would poison your coffee If you were my wife I would drink it.

Mother: David, come here. David: Yes, mum. Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse. David: But but but… .I will only get my report card tomorrow Mother: I know that, but I’m going Hong Kong tomorrow so I’m scolding you now.

The most “hungry + sad” moment . . . When you’re sitting in the examination hall, feeling hungry & then the invigilator is served hot “tea with samosas”.

The Most Dangerous Word In The World Is . . . . . . . . . . . RESULT

Question: Why most of the engineering students Can’t clear all subjects in 1st attempt..? ? ? ? Answer: Smooth roads never make good drivers, Clear sky never makes good pilots & Clearing all subjects in the 1st attempt, Never makes good engineers.

I cried when i failed in 2 subjects, . . but . . . . . . . I smiled when i came to know my friend failed in 5 subjects I love my friend xD !!!

Question by a student !! If a single teacher can’t teach us all the subjects, Then… How could you expect a single student to learn all subjects ?

How 2 spnd 3hrs in xam hall? (2pm to 5pm) 2:00- 2:10 writ d reg no&sub cod 2:10-2:40 read crfuly d instrctn given 2:40-3:40 read d questn paper twice 3:40-4:15 see if you understand any question 4:15-4:20 ask 4 water & drnk 4:20-4:50 check whether u’ve filled al d details carfuly